Monthly Archives: December 2009

“Quickly, to the Exits”…Not THAT Quickly!!!

It’s becoming my Tuesday morning ritual to reach out and grab the Crackberry and through blurry eyes search through my twitter feed for that one tweet I’ve been waiting for: “AnyoneButMe Episode 2! Watch it now! http://tiny.cc/2m3nG“. Up I get. Seriously, I’m not even like this on Christmas morning, any morning for that matter. Given that I’d just had four days away from the job and the sun hadn’t even thought it was a decent enough hour to rise my getting out of bed without hitting the ‘snooze’ button five times is a feat nothing else could manage. Thankfully this morning I managed to do it without banging into the door. I’m improving.

Okay, so when last we left our favourite couple our heroine Vivian was hanging perilously from the edge of a cliff as Aster raced through the forest to try and rescue her. Her trusted sidekick Archibald enchanted by a magic spell cast by the lovely Elisabeth. Oops sorry, completely wrong story. Too much ‘Enchanted’ for me this Christmas. Writers of ABM – completely disregard the Vivian in peril remark. That is NOT a good idea!

So really, when last we left my favourite couple they were in a very good place. Thankfully (I do beg the powers-that-be to keep it this way), this is how we find them at the beginning of ep2. Of course, in the last episode written and directed solely by Tina Cesa Ward (S1 ep4 – Vivian and Aster) we also found them very happy, unfortunately that’s not how they ended the episode. However, this time they stay happy. With Vivian making weekday trips up to the city to visit Aster it looks like things are really going well with them. I tremble as I write that because if years of watching dramas has taught me anything it’s that when your favourite people are the most happy – this is when writer’s like to rip your heart out! For now though I’ll just exist in this happy place. I like the happy place writers!

I’m curious to see what part Aster’s parents are going to play this season. As in Tina Cesa Ward’s previous episode, Aster’s parents are mentioned although we never get to see them. Now that they’re coming home at “human hours” we might actually meet them. From what I recall in the Writers on the Lam bit, we could be in store for some recognisable faces. Heck, they got Sylar to say he’s addicted to it I’m sure there’s a bunch of people wanting to be a part of this show.

There are definitely some parental issues there and as much as I love seeing Nicole Pacent and Rachael Hip-Flores on screen together, it’d be nice to see Aster have some proper screen time away from Vivian just so we can get to understand her more. I imagine they could be some pretty heartbreaking scenes because the writing is first class and Nicole Pacent is generally amazing. Plus, if Aster’s upset then you know she just might have to go spend some time with Vivian in Westchester. Again, happy place!

What's in store for Sophie (Jessy Hodges)?

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The Perfect Year(?)

What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?
I started tweeting – and boy I just didn’t know how to stop lol! I also *PING*ed someone for the first time, although it was by accident. This Crackberry thing is a lot harder than it looks, although I was reminded that’s what I said about Twitter and 6,000+ tweets later I show no signs of stopping! I went to my first opera. Took my first trip off Manhattan when I went on the Staten Island Ferry and took the subway to Brooklyn – trees do grow there. For the first time in five trips, I managed to leave NY with a smile on my face and very much looking forward to my return. I wore several different hats this year. At times I was an event photographer, I was a casting agent, and I finally felt that I could legitimately call myself a writer.

Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
None to keep so none to break. I find it best that way.

Did anyone close to you give birth?
A couple of people at the job but no one I’m particularly close to. Next year though who knows?

Did anyone close to you die?
As always I’m grateful the answer to this is no. I hope it stays that way.

What countries did you visit?
This year was about me getting on a plane to share a meal with those whose faces I missed the most so it was all about the US. I had trips to San Francisco, LA, Vegas, Illinois, and of course NY.

What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
My payrise would be nice, but that’s all very political and out of my hands at the moment. There’s hope I might see it at some point next year. Other than that I’d like to have more time. My year was so full, but then I think it could have been so much more if I’d only had the time. I would like to have spent more time with the kids, I was doing quite well at the start of the year but in the last quarter it got harder. I’ll do better next year.

What date from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
This year was full of memorable moments, the launch of LDNmeetsMNL, meeting Bert and Ernie, but I’m going to have to go with June 1st. Exactly half way through the year at the end of a road I’ve spent a long time travelling down, I ended up where I needed to be. I haven’t been able to stop smiling since.

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Yes We Can!

Vote Anyone But Me!

So if you’re reading this it means you’re online, and it’s not a big leap to think that you may have some time on your hands. In which case, let me take advantage of circumstance. If you’ve stumbled across this post you are most likely an Anyone But Me fan, or if you’re not – even better, because hopefully you will be once you’ve taken a look at the show. So go see, then come back.

Okay, so ABM. You love it. You want to know what you can do to support it. The answer is simple – vote. If ABM is to continue being the wonderful show that it is then the momentum around the show is going to need to increase. Okay so Eric Stoltz loves it, Zachary Quinto is addicted to it, and Liza Weil simply, ‘Wants her ABM!’ but a little award recognition doesn’t do any harm to get the message out.

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Scar

I couldn’t waste any more of my words on you, so I borrowed these.

Do I know you? Have we ever met? You’ve got a smile I could never forget. Perhaps you’ve mistaken me for someone you know.

What’s that you say? Am I losing my mind? That’s just one of the things that I left behind. You must be talking about something that happened a long time ago.

There’s a look in your eyes I’ve seen before. It’s all too familiar but I can’t be sure. I’ve got a memory somewhere that looks a lot like you.

I’m still confused with these feelings inside. I want to reach out and hold you and I want to hide. Tell me, did I really love you or are you someone that I never knew?

If I forgot to remember your name and your face excuse me forgetting. I must have misplaced that part of my life that left all the scars…from the back of my mind, to the bottom of my heart.

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“You know I want it!”

Forty days ago shooting started on the second season of Anyone But Me and this morning just before 7am I scrambled to my PC (banging into my door on the way) to watch where my favourite show was gonna take me. My love for ABM is no secret. I’ve written about it. I’ve Facebooked about it. I’ve ABM-ed my friends to death about it. And Lord knows I’ve tweeted about it. Ever since I knew the date for S2 a little subconscious clock in the back of my head has been ever so painfully counting down to the moment. This morning it finally came. Short version: I haven’t stopped smiling since. If you want the long version, keep reading.

Episode one. Where do I start? Like a lot of ABM fans out there, in fact fans in general, I did the whole rewatching of the previous season marathon. Logistically a lot easier than for most shows – this is possibly the only time I am thankful each ABM episode is so short, although should the creators (you know who you are) wish to make them longer I’m sure I would cope. However that didn’t seem to matter because as the recap was happening I was getting increasingly excited even though I’d just seen it the night before! This is what this show does to me. In fact, another thing this show does to me is make me not eat. I had my breakfast right there with me and I just couldn’t eat because I was so full of excitement! Then it came, Rachael Hip-Flores‘ voice, ‘And now, season two of Anyone But Me…’

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LDNmeetsMNL

At the beginning of this year I was really excited by the prospect that I might actually get to write again. It had been a while, and it had gotten to the point where I was finding it difficult to find reason to put pen to paper without it causing the surfacing of some not-so-healthy emotions. I needed focus. I needed something to write that got me thinking again. Two of my friends who had been readers of my old journal gave me that opportunity when they asked me to contribute to the projects that they were working on.

The first one didn’t pan out as either of us had hoped, the subject of the site wasn’t something that I was familiar with and so I found it difficult to figure out what exactly I was going to do. However, I remain immensely grateful for that chance and that someone believed in me enough to want me to be a part of something they were creating. I’ve watched Le-Mode grow over the past year and though I was right when I thought it wasn’t the place for me I’m glad that others have found their place there.

I seem to have found my place at LDNmeetsMNL. The brainchild of a friend from my college days, who also happens to be one of my bestest people, LDNmeetsMNL was created to bridge that gap between Flipinos around the world and things that were happening back home in the Philippines. I knew a bit more about this having done my college coursework on a similar topic and I thought that at the very least I could help a friend get their idea off the ground. Also, I’ve never quite been able to learn how to say ‘no’ when a friend asks.

Over the past 10mths I’ve been trying to do my bit and come up with articles for the site. I try to write things that are relevant for those people who may not be aware of everything that’s happening in the Filipino community but to also explore ideas about what it is to be a Filipino who doesn’t quite know what that means. I don’t have my finger on the pulse as much as I would like, I know very little about Filipino entertainment and I catch things here and there about what’s going on in Filipino politics – which can often be just as dramatic as any Filipino shows.

It was only recently that I realised how big LDNmeetsMNL had gotten. I know that I have some very supportive friends who do their bit and read the articles whenever I beg and plead for them to do so. They’ve dutifuly joined the Facebook group and follow us on Twitter, but they’re my friends and they’re the bestest so as incredibly grateful as I am (especially of those who aren’t even Fili) I wouldn’t expect anything less. When someone hasn’t been guilted into reading it though and they know of it and say something to someone like, ‘Oh this is the site I was telling you about…’ it’s just so amazing to me.

Sometimes it feels like I’ve got a second job. Running around on assignment, covering events, going to screenings, being invited to dinners. There isn’t a paycheque yet but if there was I think I may just have found one of those jobs that you’d do for free. It is tiring and it is hard work and more often than not I come home exhausted but I am in this endeavour with some of my very best friends and the fact that I can legitimately put ‘Intrepid Ace Reporter’ on my card puts a smile on my face.

I am genuinely excited when a new update comes out just to see what everyone else has written. We all discuss our ideas but we go off to our respective computers and write it up and then don’t see the finished issue until it’s been posted. So when I get that e-mail that a new issue has been posted I quickly go to the site to see the final product and I am always blown away by what we’ve managed to achieve. It makes me want to be better at what I’m doing because this thing we’ve created deserves it.

When I said that I would write for the site I never imagined where it would take me. In the past few months alone I’ve met people I would never have been given the chance to. I have discussed ideas and concepts with like minded individuals who actually want to hear my opinions. I’ve been given backstage access to events I probably wouldn’t have been able to even get a ticket for. Most importantly though, I have been able to help a friend make their idea a reality, I believe what I’m doing is important, and I am a writer again.

Not even a year old and I am already so proud of everything we’ve achieved. I know that next year is going to bring us even bigger and better things. I’m so excited to find out what’s in store for us.

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Archived

I haven’t been counting, yet some part of me has. Or perhaps life still likes to laugh at my expense sometimes, maybe not laugh. Life takes these opportunities to remind me how far I’ve come. Only I’ve been here before. That’s what I’m reminded of. All these days where I’ve managed to stop myself from looking back, I find myself unable to resist and I count the days and I realise. 6, 8, 12.

I remember how high those walls had been built, fortified with every past hurt, still you broke through. I allowed you through. I dropped the gate and had no one else to blame for what followed. Except perhaps you, you were always as guilty a party. I let you in, yes, but you’re the one that chose to destroy.

I see it now and I wonder why I ever thought it could work again, I wouldn’t allow myself to laugh. You weren’t allowed to know that anything you said or did could ever make me smile. You’d stepped too far and I wasn’t going to allow you to forget. I justified my actions to myself, it was the only way you’d learn, it was the only way you’d change. The only way you wouldn’t hurt me again.

Still here I am again. Only I’m the one who chose to change, I decided to finally see you for what you are. I can’t believe I tried to fool myself for so long, how much faith I must have had in you to believe that you could be so much more than the person you always showed me you were.

My loss, and yours. We’ll share this one last thing. My ability gone to see whatever good it was in you that made me want you in my life. Your loss, someone who you never would have had to ask anything of, it was all yours. I would’ve stood by your side through all things.

I’ll give you this final parting gift, I allow you to mark me up just like all the others – another one that walked away. When everyone in your life has been branded this way maybe then you’ll realise that some of us didn’t walk away, we simply got tired and stopped running after you.

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