Namesake

A shared name, but more than that shared. That futile search hoping what you know not to be true, that there could possibly be someone else. Hurting to see you there, but that smile still the most yearned for sight. That need to stay by your side, no matter how much it hurt, no matter how often you were told it was madness to remain, no matter that you knew there was no denying their fate did not lie with you.

Their request that they stay, yours only that they show up. Wishes granted to you both, but with a price. They can no longer remain who you believed them to be. Envious that at least they had a certainty of who their person was, all you had was who you imagined them to be, who their actions made you believe them to be. Where they were never wrong, you always were. Their loss far greater, to that yours could never compare.

Never belonging to you, but you always tied to them. Unable to ever explain it, those most likely to be able to understand it, never needing reason: this is simply how it was. No more. Time to step aside, and in doing so prove you loved them most. You loved enough to walk away; to give them what they thought would make them happy. That was all you ever wanted.

Take one step. One foot in front of the other. Soon you’ll be far enough to not hear their heartbeat and they’ll be too far behind to not hear yours break. Let it begin now. One foot in front of the other. Their hold loose now, unaware that you’re able to make good your escape. One foot in front of the other. Go.

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